• Jodie Barringer

I have a dirty little secret that a few friends and family know about...it has seen me naked.

I have a dirty little secret that a few friends and family know about. It is something of which I was slightly embarrassed at first, but now I embrace it as a part of my life. Others look at it and question my commitment, but I stand tall when I introduce it to people. It’s worn on me, and I have come to love it. It is part of me now. It deserves its place in my home. And, I honor its place like a shrine. I bow to it with flowers and soft music and candlelight. It has seen me naked.

I am not a cook. When I bought Burlington Court, I did not even visit the kitchen before I put in my full price offer. What I fell in love with was the fact that the house was within a mile of my old house which meant I was in my exact same neighborhood and right across the street from Momma and Daddy. I fell in love with the size of the closets. I fell in love with the wallpaper and paint colors. I fell in love with the teeny tiny yard. I did not fall in love with the high walled deck. And, I did not notice the pine trees, as you know. I also did not really look at the kitchen. And, I really did not give much thought to what was in the third bathroom; I figured that I would deal with it later…once I moved in. First things first.

So, I bought location, walls, a garage, and an office…and pine trees…and a walk in tub.

Now, you know that the pines trees have been a slight issue. But the walk in tub has been a whole different matter. What the pine needles do to drive me straight up the wall , the walk in tub does to calm my nerves and drive me into nirvana! When I brought friends and family over to tell me that I had made a great purchase, everyone – everyone to even little Christopher- asked me if I were going to take out what they all called “ the geriatric tub” since it kind of “aged” my house. To each, I would kindly respond, “Absolutely NOT!” Though I had not set foot in it, I thought my walk in tub might be an asset one day when I sold my “lovely3/3 Mstr on the main w/ chef’s kit & plyrm over the 2 car gar ONE LEVEL house in Green Hills for only $ per sq ft.” I’d just let that little dandy stay right where it was.

The truth of the matter is that walk in tubs are dad gum expensive, and I was NOT going to spend the money to take out, what could be, a good thing for somebody- that would just be dumb.

A few weeks ago, I found myself with an extra hour to kill before a date. Now, I could have gotten all buffed and puffed and sat around reading the Wall Street Journal, but I happened to walk into my (now) den and glanced at the bathroom that had the walk in tub in it… Now, there had been no urge, up until that point, to try out the tub. It looked so “geriatric” sitting in there amongst the stylish grass cloth walls. I peered inside its tall sides and noted the jets on the floor, the water color changer (apparently,for mood enhancement), the hand held sprayer, and the back jets, and the side jets. I thought to myself, “Self, get yourself in that bathtub this minute and try the darn thing out!”

So, I did.

I let the water run until the bath was over the jets and then crawled in over the door by way of the toilet as a stair step. I took my book, the newspaper, my Sonos controller, and a glass of wine. I put on some Don Williams, and let it happen. And, happen it did.

To the tunes of The Gentle Giant, I fell in love with my walk in tub. I have not been the same since. I talk about my tub, I think about my tub. I miss my tub when I am in the shower down the hall. I miss my tub when I am driving to a showing. I think about its jets and purple green water. I think about its perfectly slanted seatback. I think about how soothing it is to be covered all the way up to my shoulders in warm water that was drawn just for me. It’s my own private hot tub.

I have invited people to take their turn in it. But, I have had no takers. Maybe that is gross to offer your walk in tub to somebody. I don’t know, I thought is was being kind and generous to share my passion and raison d’etre with others. But, heck, I don’t know. It is weird, though: sometimes, I get the feeling that people are talking behind my back about my W-I-T.

But I am a mature woman, and sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me. Besides, I can just go sit in my tub, if my feelings get hurt. Anyway, I’ll bet that they are just jealous that they aren’t old enough to have one yet. If I don’t come to the phone, you’ll know where I am! Toodle loo!

Kiss your babies, tell your parents that you love them, and take a walk in the park with a friend.

Love to you- warm baths to all! Jodie

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